The business deal of your life!
You are striving to realize the business deal of your life. For some readers the tension is about earning a couple of thousand, for others a multibillion deal. The size of the deal doesn’t matter. What is important is that it is a huge matter to you. Every bit of your time and energy is put into this effort to make a financial success. You think you have gathered all the facts and related enough to your stakeholders to know what they are up to. And most of all, you thought you could keep your emotions in check. You were dead wrong.
Don’t blame yourself for it. Leaving your emotions aside in contract negotiations is like thinking you can walk without legs. Especially when the deal is all about you. It’s personal, pure and simple, and there’s no way you can leave yourself out of the equation. You perceive yourself only through your own eyes and bring your personality along with the ride. Forget about your blind spot, you’ve got it covered.
Negotiations in the mud
Not intended the negotiation process drags on forever with lots of unforeseen hurdles that keep piling up. You come up with all kind of negotiation strategies that worked for somebody else, but don’t seem to help you in any way. Every time you think your business can negotiate positively, your opponents are not willing to sign the contract. The more energy you invested, the more you want to succeed. It must succeed, at any cost. And here lies your problem.
Your stress level builds up and you don’t see clearly anymore. You get tensed and irritated that nobody seems to relate to your point of view. In your head you still think you have to do it all by yourself and you start investigating negotiation skills online. You put the fragmented knowledge into practice and again don’t get what you want. Your opponents don’t bow, they really don’t care. How can this be justified?
To be honest, the world can be a cruel place and you are entitled to nothing. Nobody gives a rat’s ass about who you are, what personal stories are and what you assume you can have. If you think they will listen to reason, think again. You keep repeating yourself and you pump up the volume of your voice. You are a serious businessman and demand the respect you deserve. But all this is just a distraction you are running around in circles. It has got nothing to do with respect. In negotiation it is not about you, but giving the other person what he wants on your terms.
Indifference in negotiations. Are they listening?
Just as you bring your own blind spot to the negotiation table, your opponent has the same problem. The manifestations in your life are the outcome of your emotions. Your emotions are an expression or your thoughts. And behind your thoughts lie the intentions you want to be expressed. Deep rooted, the engine underneath operating your behavior is your incorporated value system. You created your values based on the family that raised you, your culture and propaganda fed to you during your life. Depending on your life experiences a hierarchy of values was a set that helped you to survive. You have become the person today because of this, and don’t forget it served you well.
But not with your current negotiation. People don’t listen. They do not act as you wish. Are they really effective negotiators or also heated up by their emotions? Your blood pressure is rising and the trembling pain is all the energy out of your body. A drop of water on your head is not harmful in any way, but the ongoing repetition makes your skull wants to explode. You want the negotiation process to end quickly. At any cost, as it takes such a huge toll on your life. Your growing irritation is now noticed by your opponents who were waiting for your breaking point. They weren’t aiming for results, they were aiming for you to get out of control. And by now, with your well-prepared negotiation plan, you start making mistakes. Or as Mike Tyson, the famous heavy weight boxer used to say:
“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.”
Watch out following implicit rules!
Human behavior dictates that people follow not only the explicit rules, but also the implicit rules. The herd mentality in society is guided by the power structure and social proof. The power structure demands that you obey authority and willingly do so. All your life you are pressured not to listen to yourself, but to give in to any authority figure presented to you. It doesn’t matter if it was your father, mother, school teacher or boss, the result is always the same. You deviated from your intended goal you had in mind. So why would this business be any different negotiation, your opponent thinks?
The social proof paradigm integrated into your being is that you should always be fair in negotiations. That you should give the other the benefit of the doubt and really believe what he brings to the negotiation table. What will others be thinking of me if I bully and separate myself from the herd? People have a strong tendency to compare themselves with each other and every deviation has the chance of you ending up being the outcast. But realize that everything said during business negotiations is just smoke and mirrors. Most people must be wrong to swing the energy to the opposite side. The moment the negotiation ends with or without a deal all heated emotions will vanish and life goes on.
You are looking for the right rhythm in negotiations. Fast pace when it suits you, but parking when the opponent deviates too much from your intended result. Be very careful with following implicit rules as being perfectly normal during the negotiation process. Think very conscious about every step of the way, and do not board the next if it’s not clear how that contributes to your objective. Every step contains a hidden value that, if you are not aware, can end up in your camp or in the lap or your opponent.
Your business deals guided by a professional negotiator
I sincerely wish you a power negotiator by your side who can seal the deal of your life. Business negotiations can be tough and a strategic skilled negotiator can make all the difference. Someone to relate to confidence who clears up your blind spots, gives you the needed ammunition for your intended results. If you are open to negotiation strategies and in need for negotiation skills, please let me know. Looking forward to guide your negotiations and create a financial abundant life.
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